Some Super Hero Truths!

Have you ever noticed how you never see Batman and billionaire socialite Bruce Wayne together? Now you may brush this off as meaningless since the two have no reason to even know one another, but there have been many reported instances where Bruce Wayne mysteriously disappeared just moments before Batman showed up on the scene. Is this coincidence, or is this simply undeniable evidence of THE TRUTH--

Bruce Wayne is avoiding Batman!

What kind of white collar crimes is Wayne Enterprises involved in? What does its chairman have to hide? And why have so many gadgets gone missing from its tech department? To which country is Wayne selling these weapons? And what does this have to do with 9/11?

Don't let yourself be blinded by the glitz! Don't let your voices be silenced! Seek the truth! Speak the truth!

TRUTH!

Well, do you think that it could be that Bruce Wayne is Batman?

Nah, that's ridiculous. What am I talking about?

The TRUTH is that Bruce Wayne is a Nazi. He amassed his fortune by stealing from the millions of Jewish people that died during the holocaust. He tried to hide his Swedish ancestry by changing his name (originally Bruch Vanyegaz)

Batman is a a reputed Nazi-Hunter (As comic #4560, Don't Jew dare!, pub 1972) and if he were to find out Wayne's ties to the Nazi party he would quickly kidnap Bruce Wayne and ship him off to Israel for a war crimes tribunal.

It also occurs to me that not many people hang around when Batman shows up. Would it be unreasonable for me to suggest that Bruce Wayne simply wants to avoid bodily harm and so flees at the first sign of danger, before Batman arrives. I mean he's just a rich playboy, he has no business getting mixed up in the criminal. Just because these two aren't seen together is no reason to start coming up with bizarre rumors and speculation.


I'm more concerned with that Clark Kent guy who works at the Daily Planet.

He must work out quite a lot, but you never see him in the gym. In fact, when Superman appears Clark conveniently disappears, which is strange, because if Clark took off his glasses....

....Hold on a sec....That's it!

Clark is a distant relative of Superman and disappears to use his journalistic insider info to contact Superman and have him appear in a split second! Clark Kent is always seen fleeing from trouble, no wonder Lois Lane has the hots for Superman instead.

Also, I know this guy called Peter, who lives with his aunt in a tiny apartment in New York. What a sad fuck.